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That damned George Lucas owes me nine dollars for messing up a great story with awful dialogue and absurdly ridiculous scenes that were so outside the realm of reality, they didn’t even make sense in a fantasy world. Suspension of disbelief is one thing; suspension of sanity is quite another.

For every sequence saved by Yoda, there were at least three destroyed by cliches, bad acting or obvious closures in storyline gaps. Yes, the special effects were fanfrickintastic. But, again, for every ten minutes of mesmerizing special effects, there were at least twice as many inconceivably contrived moments, like the entire “lava scene”.

I went to a midnight showing of Star Wars Episode III IN Los Angeles WITH people who were so well versed with the story, they were standing in line quoting scenes in Spanish, French, and any other language option available on their personal DVD collection. When Anakin Skywalker had his “moment” of “rebirth” as Darth Vader, the audience should have been awed by his fearsome dark power. They shouldn’t have burst into laughter at the hokiness of the scene.

George Lucas had YEARS to get this thing right. He had ample opportunity to employ actual dialogue writers and/or anyone with the courage to stand up and say, “This is complete crap and you need to rewrite it”. From start to finish, I’d add.

I’ll have to see it again this weekend, just to make sure I didn’t miss anything.

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