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Loud Guy: {phone rings} Hello? Yeah. No, I’m in a Walgreen’s in Venice. I’m in town the whole week. No, I’m staying at the Marriott in Marina del Rey.

Me: {thinks, “Who announces their personal business to a drug store?”}

Loud Guy: Yeah, the whole family is here. Just call me if you need anything.

Me: {looks across aisle to see Hulk Hogan in jeans and a t-shirt}

Hulk Hogan: {walks over and stands next to me} Talk to you later, man.

Me: You know, since I came here two months ago, you’re the first person I’ve met that I recognize.

Hulk Hogan: And I don’t even live here.

Me: And we haven’t met, either.

Hulk Hogan: {gently shakes my hand} I’m Hulk Hogan.

Me: I’m Scooterdeb.

Hulk Hogan: What are you doing later tonight?

Me: …

Hulk Hogan: Because you should watch my new show, Hogan Knows Best on VH-1 at 10 PM.

Me: 10 Pacific or Eastern?

Hulk Hogan: …

Me: …

Hulk Hogan: Good question. Anyway, it’s a show about my family. We’re the Anti-Osbourne’s.

Me: Ah, so there’s no cursing and you won’t be throwing a ham over the neighbor’s fence?

Hulk Hogan: …

Me: …

Hulk Hogan: There’s no cursing, no drugs and no rehab. I run a tight ship at my house.

Boy: Can I take a picture of you with my friend?

Hulk Hogan: Sure, man. Stay in school.

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