My mother handed me an article she said she’d cut out of the newspaper. The headline said that a woman could wear beige shoes with white slacks. I thanked her, folded up the article and
set it on fire stuffed it in my purse.
Mother: I thought you could use that advice for what to wear at your new job.
Me: Thank you.
Mother: Isn’t that good to know? That beige shoes go with everything?
Me: I… I don’t have any white “slacks”.
Mother: But you could buy a pair of beige shoes.
Me: Did you cut this article out of Senior Citizen Weekly? Because I’m not going to wear beige shoes.
Mother: What if you’re wearing a navy blue skirt?
Me: I’d wear navy blue pumps.
Mother: What if you’re wearing a black skirt, then?
Me: You’re just toying with me, aren’t you? I’d better not see any beige shoes in my Christmas stocking this year.