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We’ve had a recent run of bad luck in the information systems staffing department at my office. For quite some time, there were two guys that tried to keep the place from falling apart. They were in charge of the local network and the phone system. One of them, a man we shall call…Busy Bee… was “the boss” of The Other Tech. It sometimes took awhile to get help calls resolved, but I just figured that BB and TOT were extra busy with loads and loads of corporate deployment things. Or something.

Then it got weirder. TOT unexpectedly handed in his resignation. There is no giving of two weeks’ notice at my place, as they’ll spot you that. If you’re quitting, you have to pack your things and leave the same day. In his email, TOT stated that commando training and six years with the Royal Marines hadn’t prepared him for some of the people in our office. He took a new job in a building down the street.

TOT’s absence left BB in a bit of a bind, because he was used to delegating all the real work. Suddenly, people expected BB to actually DO SOMETHING LIKE WORK when he came over to their computer. He started to have a mental breakdown.

Meanwhile, the corporate IT office sent him a New Guy to replace TOT. That week went something like this:

Monday: New Guy arrives. BB leaves at noon.
Tuesday – Friday: New Guy sits in office alone.

The next week:

Monday: BB shows up to officially quit and to clear out his office. New Guy panics.
Tuesday – Friday: New Guy seen checking the classifieds.

The next week, we didn’t see the New Guy for a couple of days, then everyone got an email from corporate IT saying that New Guy had quit.

Now we have a New New Guy to replace BB. The office pool’s bookmakers were a little skeptical, because, as one person put it, “This guy is three times older than all those other guys combined”, so the chance that he’d quit on a whim are slim. What we HAVE learned is that all the things we’d asked for could be taken care of within minutes (sometimes remotely), yet they would have taken DAYS for BB to complete.

I wonder when New New Guy’s slacking will begin.

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