You may or may not know this about me, but I have this irrational fear of driving over plastic grocery sacks. For whatever unknown reason, I am entirely convinced that if I run over one of these ethereal things, it will immediately commence to attaching itself to the hottest part of the undercarriage, where it will melt in to the engine block and ruin my car.
I believe this, even though it has never happened to me, it has never happened to anyone I know, and I have never read about it happening to anyone else.
This morning at the bus stop, I saw an errant sack flying around in the road and figured this was my chance. I would play a game of “Witness the Sack’s Wrath”. I would finally get to see some plastic melting and some engines failing. The bag whipped around the road, paused in a variety of lanes, swooped over cars waiting at the red light, briefly got stuck on the grill of a Lexus, then slid under some cars before it finally wafted away into a parking lot – out of danger and out of the game.
It was just as well. The novelty had worn off by then and was quickly replaced with a twenty-five minute game of “Where’s the Effing Bus?”