I got Ramen noodles and brown mustard

The New Guy was penitent this morning and effusive with his ass kissing. Will I be swayed by this immense display of brown nosership? Only time will tell.

CK was telling me that someone stole her lunch out of the office refrigerator. I asked what they’d taken. When she said “tuna”, I thought she meant they had taken a can of tuna. No, they’d taken PREPARED tuna salad that was in a crapperware container with CK’s NAME sharpied all over the top, bottom and sides. Said container was UNDER other containers in the fridge, so the thief went to a lot of trouble.

I’m totally insulted that no one has ever stolen MY lunch out of the office fridge. Brian slaves away, making my balanced lunch each morning, and no one has had the nerve to knick it. I’m tempted to create a fake lunch to use as bait – just to see what sort of contents would finally drive my co-workers over the edge and in to a life of office lunch larceny.

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6 responses to “I got Ramen noodles and brown mustard

  1. Hey, I have CK’s name sharpied all over my bottom too!

  2. aw.

    i’d be sure to steal your (brian’s) lovingly prepared lunch. i’d even leave little request notes from individual letters cut out of newspapers like ‘less mayo next time’ and that kinda stuff.

  3. Hey, I have CK’s name sharpied all over my bottom too!

    Cuz you my bi-atch, yo.

    One of the BEST nights of my life, darling boy. I loved how that pale Irish skin seemed to soak the ink up like butter.

  4. …I vote we take away the sharpies. now.

  5. It was that little fella in the apron. I’m sure of it.

  6. One of the BEST nights of my life, darling boy. I loved how that pale Irish skin seemed to soak the ink up like butter.

    Oh, momma….hurtin’ never felt so good!

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