Since I’m too exhausted to write a proper post (is it possible to wake up with a hangover if you didn’t drink any alcohol the night before?), I’m turning today’s entry over to Minimum Wage, who has agreed to be the Guest Poster.
OMG!!1! You won’t believe what happened! I was in a box with nine other guys and then this lady looked inside at us and PICKED ME! I had been chosen! I wondered where I was going, and I overheard her talking about The Lebowskifest and something about driving to Hollywood on the 10.
Once we arrived, she and this handsome guy had a discussion about “the wrong parking lot”, but the place looked OK to me. We all went inside a place called The Knitting Factory and I have to say I fell asleep, because I was inside a bag and it was dark. But I did see that there were people from the movie signing books and a Morrissey Tribute Line Dancing Group called Mextasy and drunken patrons yelling, “This aggression will not stand, man!”
Here’s a picture of me and the bag at a Family Restaurant. Those other guys are stowaways, I guess. I don’t know what their deal was, because they stayed on the outside of the bag the entire time. Stow-out-ways, maybe??
Saturday night was better for me because my people took me out of the carrying bag and let me sit in a chair while everyone was bowling.
I met this other red guy who was just my size. He didn’t say much, though.
There were lots of guys named Walter. Although they claimed to be calmer than me, one of them flashed a piece out on the lanes.
Something strange happened later when my special lady picked me up and handed me to this fellow and asked, “Would you mind holding him for a picture?” That wasn’t the strange part. The strange part was that HE said, “Didn’t I hold him last year for a picture?” and I know for A FACT that *I* wasn’t at that bowling alley last year. Did he pose with a ringer last year?
He picked up a bowling ball and I panicked because I thought he was going to hold on the ball and throw me instead. I braced for impact.
But he threw a strike. With the ball, not me. And then he handed me back to my special lady and I hung around while she talked with one of her bowling partners. He came in second place in the trivia contest and got a trophy with a golfer on top.
I was ready for bag after THAT long night.